A Boy. A Beard. A Blurb: Alexander Graham Bell

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The following is an excerpt from a piece originally seen on Harry’s Five O’Clock Mag:

Ever feel like the billion streams of communication currently at your disposal—Twitter, Tumblr, BBM, Facebook DM, iMessage, GChat, iChat, WhatsApp—are prematurely salt-and-peppering your steeze? Blame Alexander Graham Bell, who blew minds when he created the first practical telephone in 1876. While these days we take for granted the fact we can be virtually anywhere at any time, teleporting yourself into meetings in Beijing while you sit on your sofas wearing PJs, Bell’s telephone was the first time you could talk to someone who was, like, not in the same room as you. A proper wizard, this man. 

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“A Man. A Mustache. A Mantra: Alexander Shaler” on Harry’s Five O’Clock Mag

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The following is an expert from my regular column on Harry’s Five O’Clock Magazine, “A Man. A Mustache. A Mantra”:

If wartime had an equivalent in the corporate ladder, General Alexander Shaler was the type who shimmied up that thing so fast, all you had to do was blink and he was suddenly your boss. The expertly mustachioed man had a reputation for wise military maneuvering and intelligent instruction. Never one to go easy on his charge, Shaler was the type of drill sergeant that gave the term its chops. The general asked a lot of his men, and his men gave freely in turn. Because – as many of you reading this in the confines of a centrally heated office probably know – a good boss is a boss you want to work for, even if you go home feeling like you’ve been rung out like a wet towel.  

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“The Bathroom Attendant: 20 W 29th St” on Harry’s Five O’Clock Mag

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The following is an excerpt from my piece “The Bathroom Attendant: 20 W 29th Street” as seen on Harry’s Five O’Clock Magazine:

Welcome, sir. And won’t you allow this gentleman to open a set of brass doors for you? And then allow a second gentleman to open a second set. Pass low tables packed with bearded freelancers basking in the blue glow of their MacBook Airs. Ignore the delicious smell of freshly fried scotch eggs wafting through the air. The food can wait; there’s business to attend to. Traipse down the stairs, list to the right and here it is: A black-lacquered lavatory suitable for graphic designers, entrepreneurs, and you. 

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“A Stud. A Shave. A Statement: Crazy Horse” on Harry’s Five O’Clock Mag

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The following is an excerpt from my column “A Stud. A Shave. A Statement” as seen on Harry’s Five O’Clock Mag:

Long before the invention of drones and chemical warfare, people had to defend themselves the old fashioned way, like, with hatchets and muskets and stuff. Which makes the war heroes of olden times all the more impressive. Battles were messy face-to-face affairs where the best mode of saving your hide wasn’t say, a tank, but a wiry and well-appointed horse.

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“Ask a Lady: Money Talks” on Harry’s Five O’Clock Magazine

IMG_3108The following is an excerpt from my column, “Ask a Lady: Money Talks” on Harry’s Five O’Clock Magazine:

Money. There are television shows about it, books written on it, websites dedicated to its discussion. Empires rise and fall on the ebb and flow of the greenback tide. We handle it every day. Its existence is unavoidable, omnipresent. But when it comes to talking about cash, one-on-one, what’s appropriate?

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